simple thoughts

Letter to Satsvarupa — New Delhi 2 November, 1973: Regarding the black lady in Cleveland, if she is actually serious about Krsna consciousness, give her a little freedom. Just behave with her a little gently, so she may be encouraged to spread Krsna consciousness amongst the blacks. Actually if she preaches the importance of this movement amongst the blacks, it will be more effective. This racial color distinction may continue, but when a devotee is actually advanced these things will disappear. Therefore we have to be a little tactful how to induce people to take to Krsna consciousness seriously. That should be our main object. Encourage her to sell books. If black men read our books, it will be a great achievement. As your President Lincoln gave the blacks equal rights, let us cooperate with them.

One thing that impresses on me when I read his thought and correspondence is that of gentleness and understanding; looking not at the short term but long term both for the individual, but also of the movement.

This personal interactions looking at how to bring out the best of those who take even a drop of interest in this Krishna Consciousness Movement; taking the faint spark and fanning it showing great compassion for the soul. And from this faint spark we find came many great devotees.

We see that even the smallest spark if encouraged can grow, Srila Prabhupada on his morning walk explains this fanning of the spark:

Morning Walk — June 23, 1975, Los Angeles:
Prabhupāda: That I was explaining. Because you have a little desire to know, so that we have to take, a small fire, and we have to fan it. Then it will come, blazing fire. Kali-yuga means actually there is no brāhmaṇa, but whenever there is a little tendency of becoming brāhmaṇa, we take it, accept. Otherwise there is no question of pushing on this movement. Wherever there is little chance, we take advantage. That is our process. (break) Initiation means just to see, “Here is a little chance. He is coming forward. Take it, accept him, and fan it.” This is initiation, not that “Now I am initiated, I become perfect.” (break) Theological Union, when it was started.

Lecture on BG 2.40-45 — Los Angeles, December 13, 1968:
Guest: Although all of the initiates, everybody who has been initiated into Kṛṣṇa consciousness…

Prabhupāda: So initiation means the beginning. The very word initiation means if you are engaged in some work, just in the beginning, that is called initiation. Initiation is not the end. Initiation means you agree to enter into the world of enlightenment. And if you make progress, then more you make progress, more you become enlightened. Initiation means the beginning. This is the dictionary word meaning, initiation. What is that meaning, Hayagrīva? Is that…?

Hayagrīva: Yes. Beginning.

Prabhupāda: Beginning. If you begin, agree to execute Kṛṣṇa consciousness, that is called initiation.

For me personally this is part of the mission that we take even the smallest spark, the slightest interest and desire to progress in Krishna Consciousness should be encouraged; we should look how to engage the person and help them progress.

If we put artificial blocks or hinder even the slightest flame we risk putting it out, this will be of little use for the spirit soul, but also for the movement. May be we all still have something to learn from Srila Prabhupada’s compassion for the fallen soul, and his willingness to engage everyone if even in a small way in Krishna’s service; even if they appear not to be qualified or cause some disturbance.

Lets fan the flames, fan the flames, fan the flames; this should be our aim.

As some of you may be aware especially those that follow my facebook postings I am struggling as much with my mind, but a pull also to leave ISKCON, with an extended hand and offer to help to preach Krishna Consciousness with in the schools here were I live and also for my wider vision within the local area by a group outside of ISKCON.

What has been difficult is that my vision has also been clouded by the thought that ISKCON is only interested in money and not preaching, with offers of help only forthcoming if there is an offer of large money, or some financial gain later on in the not so near future; or that my preaching will become self-supporting and pay for all my material needs and when I have achieved this then I know I’m successful. Which sort of goes against what I am about and adds to my struggles.

So my pull is why remain in ISKCON and how closely do I view my relationship with my own Guru Maharaja and the Maharaja who has offered and given much of his time helping me. More over is the view of how dear was Srila Prabhupada to his disciples and he to them, and that to aid his disciples in fulfilling the mission would be far better.

YES the issue of leaving ISKCON was even an issue back when Srila Prabhupada was alive; so these thought and things are not new as we can see in these two letters below:

You have both been very nice devotees and I would like you both to continue to make nice advancement. So please patch up any crack that may have come between yourself and ISKCON. As husband and wife you must always remain together and raise your daughter in Krishna Consciousness. I would like you to go back to New Vrndavana and fix up a nice living place for yourselves and help to develop the New Vrndavana scheme. Our ISKCON should be taken as being a family based upon love and trust, so as the father becomes unhappy when one of his children wishes to break family connections I also become unhappy when there is difficulties within our ISKCON family. So please do not consider leaving as you are spiritual children of mine.

Letter to: Isana, Vibhavati — Calcutta 21 September, 1970

My dear Gargamuni,
Please accept my blessings. I have received your letter from Vrindaban dated July 29, 1972, and I am not very much pleased to note that you are leaving our ISKCON Society forever. I have not received report from Dinanath or anyone else in this matter, so I do not know what is the real position, but such kinds of disturbances are not at all desirable. So you can come here and live with me immediately. You have nothing to do, simply chant and take prasadam. Do not be disturbed by the other devotees. Or, I am coming to India very soon, at least by October, so you please wait for me either in Bombay or Vrindaban or Mayapur, until I come back. Or if you cannot wait, you can come and live with me.
Hoping this meets you in good health.
Your ever well-wisher,
A.C. Bhaktivedanta Swami

Letter to: Gargamuni — London 7 August, 1972

What comes out is this is that Srila Prabhupada was so moved he just wanted what was best for his disciples, understanding the conditioning and pull and also the practical way of making them more settled in spiritual life. Even to direct shelter, come stay with me I’m not interested in the whys or wherefores but please don’t abandon this spiritual path, take shelter of my words and instructions.

So the question is how dear is my guru maharaja in reality to me?
How dear is his instructions even if it causes some temporary distress or hardship.
Is it a fleeting moment, or as the bible describes a tickling of the ears, ow that sounds good for now.

Again Srila Prabhupada describes the connection between the disciple and spiritual master as thus:

Regarding your questions, second initiation is real initiation. First initiation is the preliminary, just to make him prepared, just like primary and secondary education. The first initiation gives him chance to become purified, and when he is actually purified then he is recognized as a brahmana and that means real initiation. The eternal bond between disciple and spiritual master begins from the first day he hears. Just like my spiritual master. In 1922 he said in our first meeting, you are educated boys, why don’t you preach this cult. That was the beginning, now it is coming to fact. Therefore the relationship began from that day.
Letter to: Jadurani — New Vrindaban 4 September, 1972

I remember my own guru maharaja defeating my thoughts and piety as a nurse saving so many lives and helping so many; simply pointing out that I am actually helping them to suffer just a little more saving the material body but what say of the soul? What is the point of saving the body if you haven’t saved the soul may be you should put more effort in saving the soul as you do in saving the body.

This made a huge impact on my life to date, from my time remaining on the ward, to those who now are given prasadama or told stories about Krishna; taking my work to a whole new level and bringing great joy.
Through this I have been given the opportunity to expand into schools even being allowed to present in English within the Welsh language schools.

But I am also reminded of this that even if we are inspiring for or have taken first or second initiation then we are making a life time commitment, in fact even before then just by hearing and trying to follow the words and direction; so am I just unsteady that abandonment because of some hardship is found is the solution?

Srila Prabhupada explains thus about initiation:

Initiation should be given as a future hope, but we should be careful about the second initiation. As recommended by the president or GBC they should only do so when they are quite confident of a man. Otherwise, he should not be recommended. If you follow this principle it will be successful. Every day I am getting request for second initiation, but I do not know. The responsibility goes to the presidents who pick them. Unless they are thoroughly convinced second initiation should not be given. In the beginning we may be a little lenient. But if someone falls down after being initiated he should not be credited with second initiation.

Letter to: Rupanuga — Tirupati 28 April, 1974

So even if we give first initiation and there is some fall-down then there has been some progress on the path or bhakti but that second initiation should not be considered, that those of fixed mind should be offered this.

And again the point of ISKCON just being interested in money Srila Prbahupada also explains that in some cases this is necessary but that it should not be set ow you have to pay or be seen as paying this amount, but practical to the persons circumstances no demand this is explained thus:

So far as securing $50.00 for each initiation into Hare Krishna Mantra, that is not compulsory. The system is that after initiations, each devotee should collect some alms to the best of his capacity either cash or something else and make a presentation to the Spiritual Master. This is called daksina. Without daksina the initiation ceremony is not perfect. The collection of alms is not necessarily to be $50. It may be $500.00 or $5.00; it doesn’t matter. It depends on the capacity of the initiated person. But he should try and collect to the best of his capacity and try to collect and give to the Spiritual Master.

Letter to: Satsvarupa — Bombay 26 February, 1971

As Srila Prabhupada explains the connection between Spiritual master and disciple starts from the first words uttered, we take it to heart, we follow the instruction no matter what the difficulties we face or find.

So even if things may appear brighter or easier else were the question should not be why I am going to leave ISKCON, but why my love for Guru has eternally connected me to ISKCON and how best can I serve.

There will always be difficulties in this material world, this seeps over into a spiritual organization were conditioned souls exist together; but by the loving protection of Guru we can overcome; so why abandon because of some difficulty or disagreement. But the mind challenges and questions so best we then put effort into concurring the mind and become steadfast in service and absorbed in thoughts of Krishna.

Mother Urmila posted some interesting facts on her face-book which should give many of us food for thought and is as follows:

From about 4,700 disciples of Srila Prabhupada, about 1,300 were women. Some have passed away, leaving about 1,200. Of those, about 300 female Prabhupada disciples are active in ISKCON. An unknown number are active Vaisnavis but not active in ISKCON. Of those 300, I believe about 1/3-1/2 live in Alachua!

The subsequent chatter reveals something that for me is essential to longevity is this simple fact and I think it was summed up in one of the respondents as follows:

here are two types of devotees in the States:
Those who live in Alachua and…
Those who are moving there!

It is this community that makes a difference, for if we support each other than great things can be achieved, but one thing also comes out that we don’t hear much from these amazing devotees again the voice came out in the following statement:

I do have one request of the SP female disciples:Please share your your stories, knowledge, expert service skills in any format. Time is slipping away, your legacies will/should not!!!

May be we can learn from the examples of these devotees and also appreciate the need for a community, networking and support and encouragement of each other

Why within devotee association we wish or expect a utopia?
That those getting initiated should be of the very highest standard, perfect devotees in every way?

Do we actually fully understand the mercy of the spiritual master?
Do we appreciate the compassion shown, even when one appears unworthy or not of good character?

As I was looking up Srila Prabhupada’s use of the term non-cooperation and adding them into vaniquotes I came across this letter which poses some interesting questions for myself and may be some thoughts from others on it’s subject matter would be helpful:

Letter to Yamuna, Harsarani — Los Angeles 15 January, 1968: Each and every living entity is an individual soul and as such disagreement is quite possible in our dealings with one another but we have to consider the central point of interest. You are both very intelligent sober girls and I have got good estimation of you; do not take at any time an attitude of non-cooperation because you may have not agreed with another’s point of view. I have heard about the incidents created by a new devotee, Jivanuga. He appears to be a crazy fellow. He should not have been initiated, but I have given him a chance to improve.

We see that at times there is disagreement, I am sure that I’m not the only one who has this attitude of I do not agree with anything you are saying or doing so I will not submit or cooperate with you in anyway.
But in my reading I also see that the use of non-cooperation is necessary at times especially when a higher principle is there or goes against vedic injunctions. An example is:

Letter to All Temple Presidents, G.B.C. and Sannyasis — 17 October, 1975: Under the circumstances, we shall fully non-cooperate with this Swami Bon and neither we shall form any kind of association with any person whose aim it is to blaspheme the Lord or his pure devotee.

But we see that our nature if we feel wronged also comes into play, that we will immediately take up a position of non-cooperation even if this means spiritual suicide, that if we see people are acting in such way towards ourselves or us to others then there is a wider issue at hand that of surrender to Krishna again nicely explained:

Letter to Jayapataka — Bombay 19 December, 1972: If there is some discrepancy anywhere, some non-cooperation, fighting, or if the work is slow or not to the standard, it is to be supposed that the person or persons in charge are not very much attached to Krishna. That means they will discriminate: my engagement is not good, other’s engagement is good, like that. They do not know the secret of surrendering to Krishna.

This is the ultimate goal surrendering to Krishna, but then if we cannot surrender to guru then it will be impossible to surrender to Krishna; isn’t it?

But I also was interested in the latter statement on the initiated devotee who was acting a little crazy, initiation does not mean a sudden change in nature, and for some it appears the mercy of the spiritual master is that he allows this to happen to encourage and to hope that the higher intelligence kicks in; even if the person is or acting in a way that suggests that they are crazy.

Many of the early disciples I talked to express the fact that they did not actually fully understand what devotional life was, many did not know or appreciate the regulative principles, but also that for some even the chanting of the 16 rounds was some what alien. But the mercy of the spiritual master was such that he gave them his mercy and protection; after all initiation is the start not the end results are we disqualifying individuals from making this start through our own understanding or blinkered vision.

Our desire should be to take initiation and follow the instruction of our spiritual master this should be our desire being sincere and serious; as stated here:

Letter to Jayapataka — Gorakhpur 23 February, 1971: So far as cooperating with my Godbrothers is concerned, that is not very urgent business. So far until now my Godbrothers have regularly not cooperated with me and by the grace of my Spiritual Master, things are still going ahead. So cooperation or non-cooperation, it is the desire of Bhaktivinode Thakura to preach the Caitanya cult all over the world and in 1875 he predicted that someone would come very soon who would individually preach this cult all over the world. So if his benediction is there and my Guru Maharaja’s blessings are there, we can go ahead without any impediment but all of us must be very sincere and serious.

Do we look at externals or do we see the slow changes internally?

Like a flower, we have to wait for it to bloom, we see first the roots, then the stem, eventually the bud of the flower, then as the bud opens we can smell the aroma and see the delicate nature of the petals, eventually we see the full bloom of the flower.

We will see that it will take many years may be many lifetimes before we see the full nature of the devotee; but we also see the mercy of Srila Prabhupada and those who have followed faithfully in his footsteps that they watered, encouraged and initiated the spirit-soul just to encourage and help them progress in Bhakti.

Full of compassion for the fallen conditioned soul, do we also show this compassion?

One thing that was nice about working in a small hospital was the flexibility or working in other ward areas and under different disciplines within nursing which is a good thing as it gives a more rounded view of disease and disease process both physically and mentally.

However plastic surgery was an area that for me through up some issues, who and why was surgery being done. One thing that struck me was when I was asked if I personally liked the changes made, or if I felt that there partner would notice and like or that they hoped they would get a modeling career. The question I always found myself asking was who was the surgery done for and was it worth the risk.

But there was some exceptions although rare you could see that this surgery gave some relief of mind that the person felt that they could now enjoy there life, especially when it came to gender realignment as the person appeared tormented identifying with the feelings they had which was different from the body they find themselves in.

The path that has to be undertaken before gender realignment surgery is also a difficult one, undergoing psychiatric evaluation living in the gender they feel they should be; often being a focus of ridicule and public humiliation. But what is of note is that in many long studies the long term effects are sketchy, a majority are pleased that they are now the gender they always felt they were but are still troubled or find that they are still in some ways discriminated; others who over time feel that may be it was a mistake and that they wished they had never had the surgery.

We see also that for some they start with one physical change and then find another part of the body that causes them discomfort or distress; so we see those who under go many surgical procedures. As a nurse I often wanted to say when asked my opinion, “I really don’t care, I’m more interested in making sure that the skin keeps perfused and has a steady temperature” but falling back on “well it’s not for me to say really, and after all there is some natural swelling of the skin tissue so until that happens it would be hard to say what the end result is”

However this for me shows an even more defined problem, one that is not looked at or understood by the medical and surgical professions, the temporary nature of the body and our identification of it; neither realizing that our looks and beauty are only fleeting and that even our gender, culture, race are only a temporary designation that is ever changing ever moving. But each time we identify strongly with that which we think and feel we are.

Srila Prabhupada said once in a lecture:

That is the disease, that “I am this body.” Srimad-Bhagavata says that yasyatma-buddhih kunape tri-dhatuke sva-dhih kalatradisu bhauma ijya-dhih [SB 10.84.13], that “Anyone who has the concept of this bodily understanding, that ‘I am this body…’ ” Atma-buddhih kunape tri-dhatu. Atma-buddhih means concept of self in this bag of skin and bone. This is a bag. This body is a bag of skin, bone, blood, urine, stool, and so many nice things. You see? But we are thinking that “I am this bag of bone and skin and stool and urine. That is our beauty. That is our everything.

Northeastern University Lecture — Boston, April 30, 1969

Relief only comes once we understand the nature of the body, once we understand this then and only then can we have peace of mind, thus attaining real happiness as described here:

Real happiness is achieved by spiritual existence or by cessation of the repetition of birth and death. One can stop the repetition of birth and death only by going back to Godhead. In the material world, even by attaining the topmost planet (Brahmaloka), one cannot get rid of the conditions of repeated birth and death, but still we do not accept the path of attaining perfection. The path of perfection frees one from all material attachments, and thus one becomes fit to enter into the spiritual kingdom.

SB 1.19.4

Then and only then can there be true peace of mind, not under the plastic surgeons knife, but I am left wondering if I am so disturbed that only radical surgery is needed would this be the better option; or is greater knowledge and understanding the bigger cure?

Over the past few years it has felt to me that ISKCON is only about money, how to make money, and if I do some service how much money will I make. Or alternatively may be the prestige of being a big personality so big that they cannot even give one ounce of association. And the more I think about it the greater I become disturbed by it, am I only the value of my wallet? Is my devotional service only about the value it increases the size of my wallet?

Times they are a testing for me personally, my mind is a place of fertile imagination always looking always searching but rather than looking at self looks at others, to find fault, reasons or excuses not to do something as this is easy for the mind to achieve.

One thought that reoccurs is that when it comes to service there is a “what’s in it for me” mentality; this being either by notoriety or by financial reward; what I see is complaints and moans about other devotees in there execution of devotional service but is this simply a reflection of our own minds deeper thoughts or hidden desires?

However is does pose for me an interesting question, why am I doing or developing a certain type of service, what is my true motivation? And even if there is some impure motive is this a reason to lament or stop what I am doing? Am I wanting a pat on the back or a big pay out?

So is this underlying feeling that those I talk to and what I see is actually a reflection of my false desire? See this person earns so much, has so many houses he does not work for a company but is payed by the temple; ow he’s a big devotee over the years they have done so much they are worth the money they have earnt it due to there many years of service; but what is the reality? What is my reality do I think I deserve the same?

Is my lamenting that I do not have a great financial and spiritual foundation that my ambition to do some form of devotional service becomes clouded by what is seen in others; that in most dealings money appears to be the main topic of discussion. Or the reality that when faced with difficulty logging into a devotee internet sight the problem was not seen as how best to solve but ow do you know how much this costs you should be grateful even if you can’t sign in and I’m just to busy any way go some were else; my thoughts then turn to this may be I should just offer them several hundred pounds would the answer be different? But am I questioning there motive or my own?

This along with the call for help in getting the words of Krishna nicely presented in the local schools, much personal time has been taken in order to achieve this, each meeting, each presentation means a personal loss of income and so financial hardship; is it worth it? Should I lament that senior devotees appear little interested and unwilling to help; my thought turn to this again should I just offer them lots of money may be just may be then they will help? But the question returns what is my motive? Why am I doing it and is it worth it?

Sure it is especially when you see things go click and the figurative bulb go on.

I wonder for those few devotees who nurtured and cared for me in those first few years felt as they watched the light go on and my tentative steps, then my desire to join in and enter into the unalloyed service putting others before self; for this is what they showed me practically. Nothing was to much, even if it caused them discomfort, and never, never was a cost mentioned of time, effort or money just a purity to serve the mission of there Guru Maharaja, this was all that was needed, nothing more nothing less.

So the question is not is ISKCON only about money, the question is am I only interested in money, am I basing my service on what I can get in name, fame and wealth or am I truly just interested in how best to serve others and help show that Lord Caitanya’s movement is something so special that everyone should want to be a part of it.

But if deep down there is impurity of motive and in most cases it is this never ever devalues what is being undertaken as Srila Prabhupada explains:

The Srimad-Bhagavatam also confirms (2.3.10) that even if a person desires material enjoyment or liberation, he should engage in devotional service. Those who are ambitious to derive material benefit from devotional service are not pure devotees, but because they are engaged in devotional service they are considered fortunate. They do not know that the result of devotional service is not material benediction, but because they engage themselves in the devotional service of the Lord they ultimately come to understand that material enjoyment is not the goal of devotional service. Krsna Himself says that persons who want some material benefit in exchange for devotional service are certainly foolish because they want something which is poisonous for them. The real goal of devotional service is love of Godhead, and although a person may desire material benefits from Krsna, the Lord, being all-powerful, considers the person’s position and gradually liberates him from a materially ambitious life and engages him more in devotional service. When one is actually engaged in devotional service, he forgets his material ambitions and desires. This is also confirmed by Srimad-Bhagavatam (5.19.27):

satyam disaty arthitam arthito nrnam
naivarthado yat punar arthita yatah
svayam vidhatte bhajatam anicchatam
iccha-pidhanam nija-pada-pallavam

“Lord Krsna certainly fulfills the desires of His devotees who come to Him in devotional service, but He does not fulfill desires that would again cause miseries. In spite of being materially ambitious, such devotees, by rendering transcendental service, are gradually purified of desires for material enjoyment, and they come to desire the pleasure of devotional service.”

TLC 11: Service to the Lord

Just bobbing along
Just bobbing along
On the beautiful Vani-sea

Ow what fun we can have
Absorbed in the nectar
Of Prabhupada’s words

So I’m just bobbing along
bobbing along
On the beautiful Vani-sea

To learn, to find, to enjoy
Krishna, his playmates,
and all his friends

So I’m just bobbing along
bobbing along
On the beautiful Vani-Sea

Sharing, and caring
for the words
that save the soul for eternity

So I’m bobbing along
Just bobbing along
On the Beautiful Vani-Sea

Why don’t you just join in
There’s many things to
see and hear

so come along
bobbing along
on the Beautiful Vani-sea

Just one week in to starting some Vani-save it’s just amazing what you learn, but more than just learning your sharing, sharing, learning absorbed in Srila Prabhupada’s words; the pastimes of Krishna and the devotees is there a down side to all this?

Not that I can find, come join in sailing on the beautiful Vani-sea

I have never before added a contribution from a third part directly but following an e-mail from Kripamoya Das I feel that the urgency of the situation in Haiti calls for this to be urgently posted.

I will also personally guarantee that any money given will go directly to the humanitarian aid, at both the tusmami in both India and America this vegetarian aid was delivered although many of the volunteers were personally effected.

It is not a begging letter but a call to action, you too can play your part so in Kripamoya Das own words:

Dear Friends, my warmest greetings to you, and a belated Happy New Year.

I received this text this afternoon concerning one of our branches in the Dominican Republic coming forward to help out in Haiti. I thought you might like to hear about it.

Your servant, with all best wishes,

Kripamoya Das

Krishna devotees providing vegetarian food and water in Haiti

Estimates of those killed by the massive earthquake measuring 7.0 on
the Richter scale that struck the nation of Haiti at 5pm local time on
Tuesday, 12th January range from 100,000 to 200,000, most buried alive due
to collapsing buildings. Tens of thousands of homes have been destroyed and
people’s livelihoods devastated.

ISKCON devotees who have a temple within travelling distance of the affected
area are preparing to provide vegetarian food as part of its Food For Life
programme. The temple in Santo Domingo is on board with relief efforts and has
cooking facilities with numerous volunteers ready to help. Food for Life
Global is partnering with Water for Life Global who have mobile water
purifying system and they will also be providing a sanitation service.

Hare Krishna Food for Life Global is planning to work under the protection
of the military complementing the work of bigger agencies such as CARE and
OXFAM and Red Cross at present.

ISKCON is providing volunteer support from USA, Brazil, Hungary, the UK as
well as locally.

Priyavrata das, a devotee on the front line, said “it will take some time
before things stabilize in the country, and is likely to end up as a four
month endeavor”.

The Lotus Trust, the welfare arm of Bhaktivedanta Manor in the UK, is
working with partner food relief organisations currently with a base in
nearby Santo Domingo, in the Dominican Republic where food supplies are
being prepared to go into Haiti once the roads are cleared to ensure local
people receive vital help.

Your donations are crucial, 200 meals can be served for as little as £30.

Please give generously

Cheques can be made payable to The Lotus Trust and sent to
The Lotus Trust, The Manor, Hilfield Lane, Aldenham, Watford, Herts, WD25 8EZ

Online donations can be made at

http://www.thelotustrust.org/earthquake

According to Vedic injunctions there are six kinds of aggressors: (1) a poison giver, (2) one who sets fire to the house, (3) one who attacks with deadly weapons, (4) one who plunders riches, (5) one who occupies another’s land, and (6) one who kidnaps a wife. Such aggressors are at once to be killed, and no sin is incurred by killing such aggressors. (Bg 1.36)

I have been disturbed by the continuing attack on senior devoted disciples who cared for and nurtured Srila Prabhupada through his last days; stating that they in fact murdered there friend and ever well-wisher with poison, whilst missing out on the fact that for us the ultimate lesson and goal of live to return home and no longer suffer the pangs of material life was being played out in a perfect way..

It revolves around the fact that Srila Prabhupada stated that he was being poisoned, as Prabhupada worked in the drugs industry he had good grounds to say this, but also because he wanted us to understand something very important.

I have worked on the wards for many years, I have witnessed the suffering the soul goes through at the end of life, the pain whilst the soul is ripped from the body is immense (who can stand by and do nothing?); we are expert at controlling the symptoms and relive the pain of the material body.

But I’m sorry to burst many of your bubbles this comes at a price it weakens the cardiopulmonary and renal systems in the body thus shortening the expected life, isn’t it best to shorten life than have the individual suffer so, right?

Or does that make medical staff also murderers?

I don’t think so, it is the care and release of suffering out of compassion.

The devotees could see Srila Prabhupada’s suffering and were moved wanting to do the best they can to help there spiritual master, including medicines; I am convinced beyond any doubt that this was what he was referring to. As many of these drugs also have a sedative effect on the body and dulls the mind, this I am sure was not what Prabhupada wanted.

Prabhupada unlike ourselves was a true self realized soul and understood not only the nature of the soul, but also the temporary nature of the material body, that the body brings great misery and distress. It is my firm belief that Srila Prabhupada wished to show this in the most perfect way with out the effects of drugs on the body that does have a poisoning effect.

We see he was pressed on this, the devotees were distressed, who has poisoned you, am sure that if Prabhupada said it was so and so the individual concerned would have left there material body way before Prabhupada did. But out of compassion he no longer spoke on the subject only bhakti and how he can serve the devotees.

Srila Prabhupada understanding the suffering that the soul would go through for taking a life and vadic injunctions would out of compassion said who it was and why he knew it was them; simply out of his causeless mercy.

As someone who has seen many end stages of life I am convinced that Srila Prabhupada was referring to the medicines being taken, for the above stated reasons.

But I am also convinced of this, the so called mystery of Prabhupada’s death is simply there by Maya to delude souls who are of a certain frame of mind, covering them in so much nonsense and conspiracy theories that they miss out on the ultimate message and lessons of this Srila Prabhupada’s final lesson on how to escape the misery of material suffering and return home back to god head.

Well I’ve been a bit lax in updating my file sharing web-sight, no real excuse I think.

You will notice there is more than one class from Bhaktivadanta Manor; yes after some thought and consideration I’ve decided not to go every other Monday in-fact I’m only going to go once a month.

Once a month how can this be, it’s a lifeline and without devotional life will surely collapse. Well although I am planning on going only once a month the plan is to stay for three days, see panic over a days extra service and association for me.

That along with the new projects I have undertaken to help me increase my reading and absorption into Srila Prabhupada’s books, chanting and watching Soho Street classes when not clashing with work; not to worry ISKCON Melbourne I’ve not neglected you, I can down load and listen to the classes when not able to watch on-line.

So as I say there’s three classes this time the first is from Hg Dhirasanta Dasa which was a very touching class lots of really nice personal realization’s.

Hg Acaryavan Dasawho spoke on married life and how to make it a success.

HG Prayojana Dasa who gave a beautiful class form the Gita along with many fine quotes and thought that makes the class just that bit special.

Anyway I hope you enjoy these few fine classes, and will find it totally inspiring.